Monday, May 18, 2009

Oh my...

You know, I know that I tend to be overprotective of my children. And I have a mean, nasty temper. The temper thing is something I've been working on for many years (sometimes it's better, sometimes it's worse), and will most likely continue to work on until the day I die. But when you combine the two - my children + my temper = bad circumstances. I love my kids, and I want them to stay kids as long as possible. Short of locking them in their rooms for the entirety of their lives, I'm not sure I can do it... but that doesn't mean I won't try. Ask anyone who really knows me, and they'll tell you that I'm the type of person who throws myself against the wall until I stick.

What does all of this have to do with anything? I'm getting there.

My daughters are all unique and possess many different individual strengths. For example, my oldest is super outgoing and social, and it takes a lot to hurt her feelings. My youngest is the comedian of the family, and is always out to get a laugh. But my middle baby? She is affectionate and shy, but is by far the most sensitive, and all it takes is a harsh look to make her cry. She is the main reason that I want to try and homeschool my children next year.

I've already said that I'm overprotective of my girls. Now you know that my middle baby is really sensitive. So when I hear someone talking to her (or my other girls) harshly, I'll be honest with you - it makes my temper rise. It burns my butter. It ticks me off. Yeah, I get REAL angry. When I hear that a boy in her class kicks her every day when they're in line, it makes me want to go to the school and teach the kid (AND the parents) a lesson. When I hear that someone calls her names because she has freckles, I want to turn them over my knee and paddle their bottom. (Ever hear the Natasha Bedingfield song "Freckles"? If not, you should give it a listen. Brilliant.) When a friend of the family makes comments to her, it makes me want to smack some sense into them.

But my daughter? She never retaliates. And I think we all know that I can learn something from her. Just like Jesus taught, she turns the other cheek. Does it hurt her feelings? Of course it does. Does she seek revenge on those who do her wrong? Never. She just doesn't see the point. And I wish to heaven that I was the same way. If someone hurts one of my babies, I am ready to go on a rampage. What I should be doing is falling to my knees and praying - not only for help with my own quick-to-anger temperament, but also for the person hurting my child. God knows that I thank Him for my daughters every single day. Nothing in this world means more to me than them, or being their mommy. I just need to open my heart a little bit more and be an example for them, instead of it being the other way around.

3 comments:

Evan's mom said...

Isn't it amazing how much our children can teach us? Great post.

Chloe said...

Hi, I saw you on twitter I'm just wondering you are the same woman who writes from cliodnawrites website.. I am such a huge fn of all your work (even the stories I dont ship) and I wish you would continue to write, I know so many people are fans of your work you write the most amazing pieces, seriously you are the favourite author of many, - Chloe

Michelle Baker said...

Yes Chloe, that's me! I am beginning to start writing again, hopefully I'll be able to pick up where I left off without much trouble!